Crayons. They mystify me. I mean, seriously, how many colors can you come up with already? I just wanted to get the “original” size and scope, you know? Red. Yellow. Green. Blue. Primary colors. Simple.
But what was supposed to be a quick trip into Wal-Mart (I know, yeah right!) turned into a paralyzing moment of absolute wonder. I mean, who knew there could be ten thousand variations of every color in the rainbow?
I just wanted simple.
Simple isn’t an option anymore.
I remember primary colors thrilling me as a kid. If I wanted red, I could easily pull it out of the box. I found comfort in that certainty. There was no need to “test” the color on a scrap piece of paper to see if it was just the right shade. It just was what it was. RED. The same went with yellow, blue, and green. I could identify them. And I knew when I pulled them out of the box exactly what I was getting. I was good with that. I am comfortable with predictable.
But in that congested, parent-frantic aisle, familiar wasn’t for sale.
Have you ever been in a season that just isn’t unfolding in colors that make sense? It’s not necessarily bad, it’s just, well…different. And because it’s not familiar ground, you are struggling to believe the real estate you find your feet in actually belongs to you?
I have. I am.
Isn’t that what He longs to do, and be, in our lives? Out-of-the-box and keep-ya-guessing kind of King? Well, you might be uncomfortable with those adjectives, but I am learning to open wide my heart to them. Yes, there are traits to His character that are unmovable, and promises that will never be shaded differently than what He intended. I am not talking about the core of who God is or the promises that He has declared.
What I am talking about is a comfortable-ness with my relationship and understanding of Him that inhibits the craving of my heart for more.
I want comfortable because it is what I have been able to understand and come to peace with as it relates to my life. But the danger here is that I stop searching Him out. That I get my “primary colors” in a box and I define the canvas and spaces in which I think God is/can work.
But God isn’t afraid to hurt my feelings to get my feet to move.
The truth is, He is more colorful than you or I can get our tiny brains around. And no matter how philosophical I want to be or creative I endeavor to be, He will not be exhausted. His ways, His intentions, His character, His plans, His goodness, His faithfulness, His creativity, and His beauty reach depths of color that no crayon box could hope to capture.
Here’s the cool thing…the more you press past this palate of predictability, He will create a hunger deep within you for… more.
Discovering His joy, enables you to possess joy more.
Discovering His faithfulness, enables you to proclaim His faithfulness more.
Discovering His goodness, enables your vision, wide-eyed and grateful, to behold His goodness more.
And as you crave more, He delivers it. More colors, more abundance, more beauty, in ALL of it. In pain, in searching, in suffering, in laughter and in tears, in desperation and in great hope, in disappointments, in provision, in peace, in sorrow, in longing, and in fulfillment…in all of it. He is there. Every time. In every space.
So, I am not sure where you might be, but I sense I am not alone in this great desire (and perhaps great trepidation) to open wider to all that God is and has in store. Perhaps you are like me in your relationship and walk with the Lord that “simple” just isn’t an option anymore. You know deep down in your heart that there is more.
If that is you, let me assure you that it really is gonna be ok. Actually, it is going to be spectacular! If He is moving you out of your comfort zone into a land you are just not sure belongs to you, just take a deep breath and commit to looking up. Don’t miss the brilliant hues that are coming. He is so good, friend. Truly.
I am learning contentment in this life, for sure, but I am also learning that He has so much more for me, and for you, than we can get our too-small brains around. He is so kind, so patient. And His heart, beloved, is to reveal Himself to us. He longs for it. He does.
My prayer for both of us today is that we would put down our small box of colors and look up into the eyes of the One who is infinitely more.
With joy for the journey,